Saturday, August 1, 2015

Fear is a liar

Today is the day! Today I stop standing by watching life pass by & I start rejoining the living. Almost a year ago...wait I guess its been two, I worked very hard at changing the way I looked, felt, thought & ate. I was the happiest I remember being in a very long time. Then everything got turned upside down.

For the last little bit I've just been sitting by watching the trains pass me by. Every once in a while I attempt to hop back on, however I've been unable to.

Today that changes. I am embarrassed by how much weight I have gained back but that is not going to define me. I am standing in the middle of the tracks and the only way that train is getting past is with me on it. For me it's more than just a few pounds I need to shed. Its life and death & I choose life!  I'm not looking to be anything other than healthy and a little bit badass.

I have signed up for a 16 week challenge to make changes. Kind of like a jump start back on the train I fell off. If you see me trying to slip or jump, feel free to throw rocks at me or whatever it takes.

I'm trying very hard to find the new way of life that I've got now that everything has changed. Today, while I feel nervous about stepping on the scale & worried I won't be able to keep up and make it through the workouts, I feel excited & alive & full of energy. I can't wait to go grocery shopping and prep foods again and be in control.

Today is a good day!