Unrealistic expectations

This time last week I had high hopes of how I would spend my post surgery time. I thought the first day would be on the couch, flipping through the channels relaxing. I thought day two I would wake up refreshed and spend the day cleaning house and I thought today I would be back to work. I envisioned spending time planning out my garden.

Boy was I wrong.

I did spend Monday on the couch. No channel flipping as I was passed out waking long enough for Jeff to change my bandage and get me a drink. He was so good to me. He didn't leave my side at all. I also spent Tuesday on the couch. Also sleeping. Getting up to take the dogs out and that's it. I was supposed to go back to work today. I woke up at 5:45 am and could hardly move. No way was I going to make it in today either.

I have been relatively pain free until tonight. I've been very stuffed up and totally exhausted. I've also been swollen however not more than I expected. Tonight however I can breath somewhat but I have a ton of pain. In fact I have taken my first ever pain pill.

I am planning to return to work tomorrow. I was planning to return to my workouts tomorrow as well but that might take another day or so yet.

I guess I'll have to leave the garden planning until this weekend. I can hardly wait to start my seeds and get things going.

I did get one thing accomplished today. I submitted my application to Excelsior college.... now I have to decide if I want to continue my nursing or explore some other ideas I've had, like a health coach or something a little more holistic. Stay tuned for that.

Let's hope this surgery helps because right now I am regretting it very much.

Mission not intermission

I am struggling to keep in my positive frame of mind. I feel like I will have a good couple of days followed by a couple if difficult ones. Today I had a mixture of all of it.

I went to the ENT because I've had a sinus infection for over a month. He told me I need surgery. I called Jeff to ask him to take the morning off because I'll need someone to drive me. His response kind of pissed me off. It was something kind of snotty that resembled we'll see. After that headed to lianas game. It was an awesome game but her coach told her she couldn't use her music for her double this weekend. This kid has worked so hard..... home we went and scoured the internet to find replacement music that I could buy for her. She got snippy with me and nothing was making her happy.

So here is the bottom line. This is the year of my mission not my intermission. So I have been asking myself if situations are fitting into my mission. I want Liana to do well at her double. I am willing do pay a (very) small amount for replacement music. The rest is up to her. I've asked Jeff to take me to my surgery if he chooses not to support me during that its on him not me. There have been many situations recently he has chosen to make snotty remarks about and not participate in.

I actually am focused on the trip to Uganda. If I can do surgery and still go then maybe I'll do it however if it will in any way stop me from going I'm not going to.

I am working on the best me! In order for that to work I need to ignore the negative and not focus on it. I need to feed the positive energies and situations. I have so many wonderful things in my life right now and I need to look at those rather than the few ill responses I have gotten.

I am so blessed to have a job I love and am still excited to go to. A job that is full of potential. Friends and family like no other. The list goes on and on. ..... so onto making my mission list. This WILL be a great year!